I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
