So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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