get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
