She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
