I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
