Texts From Last Night

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  (415): View more from California

  Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99

  (415): View more from California

  Recession joke.

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  (415): Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99 (415): Recession joke. http://tfl.nu/0g53
  Replies (10) Good night (3158) Bad night (775)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds

  (1-440): View more from Ohio

  How much beer did you get for it?

  (440): View more from Ohio

  One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied

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  (440): Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds (1-440): How much beer did you get for it? (440): One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied http://tfl.nu/6auu
  Replies (2) Good night (575) Bad night (1666)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.

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  (405): Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts. http://tfl.nu/kf4k
  Replies (16) Good night (4938) Bad night (1229)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.

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  (317): The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope. http://tfl.nu/lawp
  Replies (25) Good night (5333) Bad night (1161)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.

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  (518): I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday. http://tfl.nu/tx0i
  Replies (16) Good night (6283) Bad night (1085)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone

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  (518): it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone http://tfl.nu/gzqw
  Replies (13) Good night (4468) Bad night (822)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  It'll be just me and my penis against the world.

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  (314): It'll be just me and my penis against the world. http://tfl.nu/ph7y
  Replies (18) Good night (3556) Bad night (896)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness

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  (515): Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness http://tfl.nu/59mb
  Replies (3) Good night (2332) Bad night (1041)
• Favorite

  (975): View more from Missouri

  At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.

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  (975): At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt. http://tfl.nu/pzgf
  Replies (5) Good night (2670) Bad night (722)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home

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  (203): Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home http://tfl.nu/rxky
  Replies (4) Good night (2075) Bad night (770)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.

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  (253): We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch. http://tfl.nu/tp65
  Replies (42) Good night (3786) Bad night (692)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?

  (1-303): View more from Colorado

  Agreed.

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  (303): There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree? (1-303): Agreed. http://tfl.nu/l0rd
  Replies (7) Good night (1365) Bad night (851)
• Favorite

  (523): View more from

  I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower

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  (523): I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower http://tfl.nu/3y30
  Replies (4) Good night (653) Bad night (215)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place

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  (714): So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place http://tfl.nu/9hat
  Replies (5) Good night (669) Bad night (230)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.

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  (631): Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why. http://tfl.nu/ugb9
  Replies (1) Good night (345) Bad night (119)

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