Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
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