the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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