so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
false alarm, still single
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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