So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
