Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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