Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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