Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
