dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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