I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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