she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
