You can't motorboat a personality
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
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