So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
