so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
