he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
