Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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