I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
