It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
How's work?
Spinning.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
