thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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