as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Randomize
