this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize
