i can't believe i had my finger in that
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
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I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
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Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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