idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
and i looked up. we had an audience...
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
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