I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
