the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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