Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
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