her vagine was all disorganized.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
