If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Randomize
