it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
