Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
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