can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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