bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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