i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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