My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Randomize
