i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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