i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
