Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
We don't watch enough power rangers
25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week