Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
