I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
you made out with another girl for some wings
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