So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
