Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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