id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Randomize
