Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
