Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
