just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
