You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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