You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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